The BIGGEST Mistake Women Make In Relationships …

“Good Morning!  Good Morning!”  (If I could sing, I would )

So great to be back at Heather’s Soul Filled Cafe!  Looking so forward to connecting with you today and helping you in any way I can to meet and marry your man!

Lord knows, I’ve been through it all … the hopes, the disappointments, the fear, the failures.  And after MANY trials and tribulations (and learning from some really brilliant people) I finally figured out (well … mostly. Some parts I’m still learning) how it really works between women and men in romance.

Fortunately, what I teach works.  Otherwise I (and many of my clients) could never be in a long-term relationship … much less marriage.

So here’s to a great day at the cafe.  I look forward to responding to your comments, your questions, your stories and anything else you want to share with us.

Let the fun begin!

Love, Cherry

P.S.  My day is a little crazy today as I’m teaching an acting class in Hollywood.  So if I don’t get back to you straight away … do not fret!  I will respond!  Carry on …

Cherry! Welcome back to the Cafe. It’s wonderful to have you and your “fail proof tips” with us.

I always enjoy the clarity and charm you bring to women while guiding us gracefully
thru the relationship landmines.

Looking forward to today’s conversation.

Xxoo
Heather

Ahhh Cherry!!! Love you so much!
What a fabulous and interesting video. 
Ok so I had to laugh because as I was making dinner last night…mmm homemade pesto, and I had just finished juicing for us (the clean up ahh) and making snacks for BEFORE dinner…he’s sitting on the couch and asks me to get him a beer. A little frustrated and annoyed I shared nicely that I was in the middle of washing and blending and organizing , and simply said ..perhaps you could get your beer this time. It did not stop there though, he decided in that moment that he would do some work outside and actually asked me to move my car!! When I did respond, it was with pure disbelief and to ease my shock he says…ok ok, Ill get the beer , dont worry and you move your car!!!!

Ok Cherry…is this a boy looking for his mom or just an inconsiderate man??

Im sooo laughing as Im typing this….you’re so wonderful and amazing Cherry I love what you’re sharing with women!

Hi, Cherry,

I second what Lisa Berry wrote on this blog – love you so much, my friend!!

And I love what you teach…I clearly remember back to the first time you and I talked about some of the things I had done in relationships with men, and I truly wanted to curl up in the corner and cry at how many mistakes I had made without knowing it! And with all the very best intentions!

I’ve made all the mistakes you talk about, in fact.

But I’ve been learning from you, Cherry, how to do it differently, and WOW, does it work!

So here’s my question: if a woman starts off the relationship by giving too much to a man and then realizes it (or learns differently from you!), and then shifts to focus more on receiving, can the dynamic of the relationship be changed? In other words, if she is used to giving and he is used to getting, and she starts receiving instead, is there a chance that he will start giving more?

Looking forward to hearing your thoughts!

Love,
Sue

Hey Lisa!

Great seeing you here!!  Your pasta sounds wonderful!  Yum!!  And your juicing sounds inspiring (haven’t gone there yet, but plan to someday !! )

Oh men!  They are so simple … and at times, seemingly uncaring.  He was just thinking about what he needed to do at the moment.  When he sees you in the kitchen, he’s not thinking about everything you are coordinating and juggling.  He’s thinking, “I want beer. She’s near the fridge.  She can get it for me.”  

Same with the car.  ”I want to do this now.  She needs to move everything out of the way.”  (I go through the same thing!)

Keep in mind, men are single focused. They usually think of one thing at a time.  And if you’re busy, they don’t think to offer help b/c they see you have it under control.  

That said, it is up to you to keep your man in relationship with you.  It was very appropriate for you to speak up.  Next time he makes a request when you’re in the middle of something, appreciate that he has every right to ask you for what he wants.  Then tell him you’re in the middle of making dinner and would he mind doing it for himself.  

He may shrug or grunt, but will usually say “okay.”  It’s just a reminder that you’re in relationship and you’re not his mother, dropping everything to take care of his needs.

Thank you so much for dropping by today!  So great receiving your note!  

Keep up the fabulous work you’re doing with dating your diet!  Love it!!

Love, Cherry

Hey Sue!

Love seeing you here!

Yes, we’ve all made mistakes, haven’t we?  It’s just b/c we didn’t know any better.  We only do what we believe is the right thing to do.  Sometimes it works.  Sometimes not.

Sometimes we have to learn what to do differently to get a different result.

Great question.  If a woman realizes she’s giving too much in a relationship, she can absolutely stop giving and wait for the man to give more.  If he does, he’s a good man.  He’ll actually be happy to give and offer things to his woman.

Little boys love receiving from women.  If a woman stops giving to a boy, he’ll probably leave.  If he does, she’s better off without him.

This is one great way to separate the men from the boys!

Thanks for stopping by!  Speak soon!

Love, Cherry

Thanks, Heather!

It’s going to be a great day at the Soul Filled Cafe!

Love, Cherry

Cherry,

I love your wisdom and the graciousness of how you convey it – to us, and in how you teach us to convey it to men!

Thank you so much!  Blessings & Joy,
Renee

Cherry,

I love your wisdom and the graciousness of how you convey it – to us, and in how you teach us to convey it to men!

Thank you so much!  Blessings & Joy,
Renee

Renee,

Thank you so much!  You warm the cuckles of my heart!

Love, Cherry

Renee,

Thank you so much!  You warm the cuckles of my heart!

Love, Cherry

Such a wonderful reminder, Cherry. And “learning how to separate the men from the boys” – that will stick in my head.

Thanks again, Cherry!!

Cherry — I just love your new video series. it really brings out your personality and the fun you bring to this topic. 

Curious about what other ‘big’ mistakes you see women make in their romantic relationships?

And…how was acting class today?  Any new projects in the works for “cherry norris enterprises’? 

hugs

(PS Sorry about the FB share issues — so bizarre, it’s like FB is allergic to the link.  I’ve tried the few technical things I could think of to do, and working on getting a pro to look into it.)

Cherry – thank you so much for this day. I wanted to add one more comment about “giving too much.”  I was thinking about it last night and realized how often women use “giving” as a way to actually manipulate the opposite sex. We can be sort of underhanded that way.  We will be “giving” but there will be some sort of outcome attached to the giving.  “He will appreciate me” “He will give me something that I want in return” or “He will love me more.”  And when you really get this, it’s truly icky. 

Now this is very different from giving that is truly “in-spired”  That is giving from the heart without attachment.  And as you guide women, this type of giving in a romantic relationship will naturally happen when we are “giving back in appreciation.”

So there you go. My additional two cents on your “fail proof tip” –that on the surface may seem “basic” or simple.  But when you dig a bit, I find your tips to be gentle nudges to help women get back into the seat of their own selves.  And that’s where the real feminine magic happens.

So, for anyone reading this.  I highly recommend watching the bonus videos from Cherry.  They are worth you time and will help you create magic in your romantic relationships.

From my heart to yours…

h.

Hi Heather,

What a pleasure it was to be here on the Soul-filled cafe!  Thank you again!

Your comment is excellent.  When you give with expectations, it’s not really a “give” it’s a manipulation.  Men don’t respond well to women who give too much and expect something in return.  

Men (masculine men anyway) like to give.  When we give back to appreciation to men, it helps them be better men as we become better women.  A woman has to love herself first, then share her love with a man.  A woman who puts a man’s feelings before her own is at risk of “losing herself” to his narcissistic personality.  Not good for the man.  Really not good for the woman.

I love how you’ve taken on this work so beautifully, Heather.  Everything you do reflects your artistry, beauty and grace.  

Thank you for offering a warm place to share thoughts, ideas and support to all of us who want to share our most authentic expressions!

Love, Cherry

If you want to know more mistakes women make, you can register for my free live tele-class happening Monday, September 23.

It’s called “The 3 BIGGEST Mistakes Women Make When First Meeting A Quality Man.”  Even if you make one of these mistakes, it’s doubtful he’ll ever ask you out!

You can register for it here:  http://meetandmarryyourman.com/three-biggest-mistakes-teleclass/

Acting class was amazing as usual!  It’s so great working with young minds and incouraging them to be their full expressed selves on stage and off!  Love it!

Sorry about the FB issues too.  Sorry others missed out on today’s conversation!

Speak soon.

Love, Cherry

Thank you Cherry!  You’ve helped me find that seat of grace.  xox